10 Hilarious Differences Between Buying a House in the US vs England

In the US, your home search might start with a shiny real estate website, drone footage, and a smiling agent talking about granite countertops. In England, your hunt begins in a quieter, more subdued setting — usually a listing with polite phrases like “quaint” (translation: tiny) and “charming rear garden” (translation: small yard with moss). The marketing tone alone tells you all you need to know about cultural priorities.

Let’s talk about realtors — or “estate agents,” as the Brits call them. In America, a realtor is your ride-or-die through the process, armed with pep talks and a range of negotiation tactics that would impress even Wall Street. In England, an estate agent is far more reserved, seemingly allergic to enthusiasm (or working on weekends). They’ll politely hand you a brochure and leave you to puzzle out the square footage on your own.

Now, the offers. In the US, when you make an offer on a house, it’s often through a formal contract that locks in both buyer and seller. In England, on the other hand, nothing is binding until the exchange of contracts, which can happen months later. This means your dream “semi-detached in Surrey” could get snatched away faster than you can say “gazumped.” (YES that is a real word and yes they use it here! I tried to insert it into every possible conversation just because I could.)

Financing is another adventure. Americans often dive into the mortgage pre-approval process early, getting detailed breakdowns and fixed-rate options. The English, meanwhile, prefer something called an “agreement in principle,” which sounds reassuring but is about as binding as a pinky promise. Good luck to anyone trying to decode which lender actually means business. This actually worked to our benefit– the first house we were “subject to close” on (or as Americans say, “under contract”) sat for six months with literally no progress tracking down some historic lien. For the first five months, we were frantically calling for updates about when we could complete the purchase. Then we spent two months reconsidering. Then, two weeks later, we decided to pull out of the house, and while we had to pay a few hundred “quid” for solicitors’ fees, it was no major consequence. Our current house had just gone on the market and it was a much better fit for our family in many ways.

Let’s not forget about the lawyers. In the US, you might work with an attorney or more commonly a title company to handle closing paperwork. In England, however, the grand-sounding “conveyancer” or “solicitor” takes the spotlight. It sounds like a royal tradition, but it’s really just someone ensuring nobody secretly owns part of your garden fence. Solicitors do A TON of work over here that real estate agents usually do in America. Everything from questions about road maintenance agreements to annual expenses and home surveys (“inspections”) is handled through a solicitor.

Speaking of closing, Americans love a big finale. Picture a day where you sign papers, get a shiny new set of keys, and maybe pop champagne. In England, the “completion” day is far less glamorous. You wire the money, wait for confirmation… for days…, and only then — maybe even a week or more later — are you told you can pick up the keys from some lockbox. No red bow. No confetti. Possibly rain.

…in fact, very likely rain.

But I digress.

Buying a house in the US can be a relatively speedy sprint, sometimes as short as a month or two. In England, the process is more of a meandering stroll through bureaucracy, teetering between patience and existential dread. As Americans, we were incredibly impatient, but all our local friends just laughed it off and bemoaned the process. Eight months later, if you’ve finally “completed,” you’ve earned your degree in British paperwork endurance. 

Then there’s the difference in what you’re actually buying. American homes often come loaded with appliances, fresh paint, and sometimes even furniture deals. In England, be prepared to bring everything — including your curtains, light fixtures, and occasionally your doorknobs. We had to quickly research the best fridge, washer, dryer, and more. The seller, after all, has probably “taken them to Dorset” (yes, that happened to us). 

And finally, the cultural approach to celebration. Americans throw housewarming parties with balloons, barbecue, and maybe a new lawnmower tutorial. Brits are more understated — perhaps a quiet cup of tea in the new lounge and a sigh of relief that the whole ordeal is over. Still, we’ve been so blessed to end up with that same universal joy of having a place to call home — whether it’s the American dream on five acres or a cozy English cottage with endless charm.